Q: Where is the bathroom?
A: The bathroom is back over by the ticket booth. Once you get near it, a sign should be up.
Q: Do I give you the ticket?
A: No, take the ticket over to the show room. An usher will take your ticket and assign you a seat.
Q: Do you travel around with the comic?
A: From time to time. We are based in the Twin Cities, so we like to be here when we’re in town.
Q: What is (comedian x) like?
A: A regular person, just like you or me, just funnier.
Q: You’re job must be so fun!
A: That’s a statement, not a question.
Q: Is your job fun?
A: Much like any job it’s work. It beats digging ditches, though. That is, unless digging ditches is what you love to do.
Q: How much is this (pointing at item)?
A: All items are clearly marked.
All Q&A assembled statistically from selling merchandise in various Minneapolis lobbies over the course of twelve years. We certainly do more than these questions would lead you to believe. We just don’t get asked those questions.